Twenty Four

We are at 24 weeks this week...pretty soon it will be the 3rd trimester! I can't believe time is going this fast.
We had our monthly appointment this week. I'm amazed how it's such a relief to hear this heartbeat each time we go. I always go in nervous, but I guess I shouldn't be. I have been a little worried about it just because I don't feel baby kick or move much yet. Thanks to the location of my placenta, low and anterior (in front), the Dr. told us it would be a little while longer before I could feel him. She said it's normal to worry, but try not to too much. I just didn't think it would be THIS long before I could feel the kicking and punching that everyone talks about. I was relieved that at this appointment she still wasn't concerned when I said I still wasn't feeling him very much. She said in the next few weeks I should start to, it's just around the corner. Don't get me wrong, I have felt little flutters here and there, and I assume its the baby, but nothing like others claim to feel who are much less pregnant than me, and nothing like my book says.. and to be honest, half the time I wonder if it was my stomach rumbling or gas or if it was really the baby. It's kind of annoying. I wish it would be obvious! I guess I just have to be patient and wait... Everyone keeps saying in due time this guy will start kicking me good! I can't wait.

At the next appointment we have to do another ultrasound to check the location of the famous placenta. Hopefully it's moved up a bit so I can start to work out (better late than never). I've was told no working out  since they saw my placenta was low at 19 weeks. It's been ok so far, and I am feeling fine, but I bet I would feel awesome if I could do some sort of workout on a regular basis.

In other news, we we ordered and picked up our crib this week! So exciting! Of course it is still in the box sitting next to all the stuff we have to get rid of in what is now the office/spare bedroom, but hey, at least it's there and ready to set up whenever we are ready. Many thanks to Joe's parents for buying it for us. They surprised us at Christmas, letting us know they would get us the crib, so we finally decided on one we liked and got it ordered. Believe it or not, it's hard to find a simple modern crib that's affordable. I am so picky! Thanks to my seasonal job at The Land of Nod, I got a good price on it. I work my last shift there on Sunday though. It will be nice to have my weekends back now that I also have the full-time job again... 2 jobs is too much for a pregnant lady!

I have the design of the baby room pretty much finalized. We bought the crib bedding right after we found out it was a boy and that pretty much set the tone for the room. I LOVE IT. My friend Megan has been great to bounce ideas off of, she's a designer too, so it's been fun figuring it out with her. Of course Joe is in on all of it too, I fill him in on the ideas and he's good with it, of course. I can't wait to get started. We have so much stuff to get rid of before we can really start, but we hope to have the stuff gone in the next few weeks. I made a digital board in photoshop and drew up the room in CAD, so I'll have to post it once I get everything finalized. Fun!

Baby, Baby, Oh Baby!

Well, it's been quite a long time since I've posted anything. SO much has happened over the past few months, its actually kind of crazy.

First, and most important news first...

We expecting our first baby on May 14th, 2012! We are very excited and time is really flying by! We have been so busy that I haven't had much spare time to blog, much less think about all the things we have to do before baby arrives. Ok, I've thought about it, but we haven't really done a ton yet. It's funny that in all of my past blogs I worried and wondered about when it would be the right time for us to have a baby and now that it's happened it seems like it is all working itself out. Like everyone says, there is no right time, but now it just feels like it was meant to be and we couldn't be happier to have this little one on the way. After 10+ years of marriage, I guess it was time!

So the story begins... I got sick for the 1st time the night before I left for California when we heard that Tommy wasn't going to make it. I was pretty nauseous and didn't feel well the whole time we were there. I thought I was just really upset because of everything that was happening, but other symptoms I was having made us wonder in the back of our minds if we could be pregnant.  

Upon returning home and taking a pregnancy test we found out it was true, we were pregnant! A little scared and shocked we confirmed it with a test at my OB's office the following week and so began our journey...

Pregnant! 10.06.2011



1st glimpse of our peanut - 10.22.2011

As I write this blog today I am now 23 weeks pregnant... over half way already, which is kind of scary. We are getting things in order but it seems like there is SO much to do. October to January went by in a blink and I'm sure the next 4 months will as well.

Other good things happened at the end of 2011...
I accepted a new new full-time position at Harrington College of Design and started right before Christmas. It couldn't have come at a better time for us. Though I will be ineligible for any kind of paid maternity leave, I am happy to have the job so we can start to get back on our feet again.

We celebrated Thanksgiving 2011 in Chicago, just a quiet day to ourselves. I was still sort of sick with 1st trimester morning sickness, or should I say all day sickness, but I was able to make a nice meal for just the two of us. We were able to fly home for a quick weekend trip to spend Christmas 2011 with our families in Omaha. We had to leave Chloe and Louie at the vet, but flying was so nice and quick compared to driving.

More Baby News...

A couple of weeks ago we found out we are having A BOY! At the big 20 week ultrasound, when we were supposed to find out, they couldn't tell for sure what the baby was. He was in a crazy position and the tech had a very difficult time getting all the views she needed to check all of the organs and development. We had to go back to re-scan 2 weeks later and it was confirmed it was a boy. Everything looks perfectly healthy with the little guy and they got all of the views they needed the 2nd time around.

As for me, I am doing well, I couldn't be happier to be past the 1st trimester as I was pretty much nauseous 24/7 up until about 14 or 15 weeks. Luckily I only threw-up in the evenings at home. It only happened once at work, thank goodness! Still, being sick like that is the worst! I was also so sensitive to smells, the big ones that bothered me were car exhaust, smoke, fireplaces burning, and body odor. I made it though and managed to eat what I could, even though almost nothing sounded good to me. I don't know if I'll ever be able to eat saltines or baked potato soup again since that's all I ate during though rough weeks.

Pregnancy has definitely changed me in many ways. I am tired all the time, so my once night-owl schedule is no longer. I can barely make it to 10 o'clock these days! I am super sensitive (yep, even more than I was) and I can cry at the drop of a hat. I've been able to manage it, I am just more sensitive to what people say to me and how they say it. When things seem to go wrong I can't really deal with it like I did before. It's definitely not a daily thing, but I am just a lot more emotional. Another big things is that I don't want certain foods that I once loved, like Mexican, Thai and some other things just don't sound good to me anymore. I don't really have any crazy cravings, but I feel like I want pizza, pasta, anything with red sauce or tomatoes more than I ever have before. My latest addiction over the past week or so has been grapefruit and orange sherbet (no, not together).  I have been eating pretty healthy aside from the occasional pizza. I've been eating lots of fruit and I am just getting back into trying to eat some cooked vegetables again. Salads and some raw veggies have been ok, but I haven't really cooked many other veggies up until last night. I had some steamed broccoli with one of our staple dinners, salmon and wild rice, and the broccoli was good. They say the baby is now eating what you eat through the amniotic fluid, so I am trying to eat as many different things as I can with hopes that I will not have a picky child, we'll see! Bring on the veggies and fruits! :-)

Well, I better run for now. I've got to do some things around here and make the most of this day off I have for MLK day. More blogs to come soon, hopefully!



The Worst News

It is with great sadness that I make this post.

My 14 year old brother Thomas passed away on Wednesday, September 28th. Cathy and I headed out to California on Thursday the 29th after having heard from Dad on Tuesday night that he wasn't going to make it. I am sad that we didn't get to see him and say goodbye in the hospital but everyone told us it was probably for the best. There was nothing we could have done when he was there that whole week, and after all the surgeries and the injuries in general, he was a completely different boy laying in that hospital bed. We will always remember him as the happy, easy going, cute little boy that he was. I'm sure it will take them some time to get the hospital images out of their minds. Seeing your child in such a horrible state must have been heart wrenching.

I dreaded getting to the house the day we arrived in California. Having been worried sick and crying a lot all week I just knew that seeing my Dad and Melissa and Delilah would be hard. I felt as though I was all cried out, but I knew that when I got to the house and saw them it would become real. We got there and that's exactly what happened. Words cannot describe how sad everyone was. It was unbelievable. We knew Dad was glad we were there and it was nice to be able to offer some comfort, just by being there with him. Seeing Dad and Melissa in that state was the hardest thing to watch. I couldn't believe that Tommy was gone and they were actually facing the death of thier son. I saw his shoes in his room and his things just as they were the day he left for school and all I could think was that he was going to walk through the door at any minute. It was unreal to try to actually comprehend what had happened.

We spent the days before the memorial service sitting around the house, helping with what we could help with, talking with the family, etc. Visitors would come by with food or flowers or just to see the family and everyone would get sad and cry again. It was very hard.

Cathy and I drove to where the accident happened. We saw the sign posted that read "We love you Tom" in his high school colors along with flowers and candles laid there from the candlelight vigil held the day before. We sat there and looked at the intersection in awe of how this could have happened. We just couldn't wrap our brain around how someone could completely run over a kid on a bike here. It was probably one of the quietest intersections in all of Elk Grove, even during after school hours we couldn't imagine how it would be that busy.

Joe came the day before to attend the funeral/memorial and it was good to have him there. The memorial service was very sad, but a very nice memorial for him. Tommy's Uncle Mark spoke (Melissa's Brother) as well as his Grandpa, and it was very touching and sad. Two of his former teachers spoke too, very nice words about what a unique, smart and sweet boy Tom was. They think about 300-400 people came to the service and it was nice to see all the support. At the end everyone filed through row by row, hugging and consoling Melissa, Dad and the family. It was hard to watch, but sweet to see all of the kids from his school and all of the friends there to show support.

It was very hard to leave knowing that Dad, Melissa, and Delilah's lives will never be the same. None of our lives will, but theirs will definitely be a new normal that will take so long to get used to. It has been a long couple weeks for me and I imagine it will be a long journey ahead for my Dad and his family without Tommy there. There will always be a piece missing for the rest of their lives. I can't imagine losing a child. No one should ever have to go through it. There are just no words to describe how they must feel. All I can hope for them is that as time passes it will get a little easier.

I got so much support from my friends and family and so did they. The support from the community was amazing and it was comforting to know they will be well taken care of. It is amazing what people will do and say to you during times like these. I am thankful for all of the support for me and for my family

View the Obituary in the Sacramento Bee

Sweet Tommy

Last Thursday morning as I was just getting out of bed I received a call from my Dad with very bad news. Tommy, my 14 year old half brother, had been hit by a SUV while riding his bike home from school on Wednesday afternoon. I immediately burst into tears upon hearing the news and hearing my Dad say how serious it was. He was and still is in critical condition and I have been worried sick about him ever since I received the call that day. I didn't go to work on Thursday because I was so upset and I talked on the phone with my sister pretty much all day. We didn't know what to do, we felt helpless being so far away, wanting to be there, but knowing it was probably best to wait and see what happens. Both Cathy and I are still sick with worry, waiting for the next call or text from my Dad or someone else who can give us the latest update on Tommy.

That morning I didn't talk to my Dad very long, but he told me that things were very bad. Tommy was in critical condition and in intensive care. He was put into a medically induced coma right away.  My Dad said that when he first arrived in the ER were told to prepare for the worst....but he has now lived through almost 5 days. We are all trying to think positive and pray for a miracle for him. My Dad said all that matters is that he is still here and they are hoping that he is one of those miracles.

After we heard the news Cathy and I were online searching for any info we could on the accident. We found an article about the accident from the local news channel here and an article that mentioned Tommy an his high school on a local forum here. Later that night we found that someone has created a "Get Well Tom Mutz" page on Facebook. When we found it there was only about 14 people following the page and today there are over 600. There has been a real show of support from the community in Elk Grove and beyond. So many kids and friends wrote on the page, many saying they were praying for him and hoping he gets better, and many saying what a nice boy Tommy is. So many people are offering to donate or do something for the family that a friend of the family started a page to accept donations here. It was so nice to see all of the support and how many people are praying for him to get better.

So now it is Monday, I am at work, but my mind is thinking about Tommy. It sounds like it has been a rough few days for him, my Dad and Melissa (Tommy's Mom) and everyone who is there with him. They have been through some scary moments. My Dad is staying positive and they are happy to hear good news, even if it is something very small. Cathy and I plan to go out to see them sometime soon, my Dad just wants us to wait and see and hopefully things will calm down once everything gets under control.


Delilah and Tommy

 I still can't believe this has happened to Tommy. You always hear about horrible accidents like this and it is always sad, but you never fully understand what the family is going through until you experience it yourself. Even though I am not there I can only imagine what it is like to see him in such horrible shape. The whole experience so far has made me realize even more how fragile life is. You never think something like this will happen to you our your family. In one moment your life can be changed forever. Whatever happens with Tommy, it has forever changed my Dad, Melissa and Delilah's lives. We can only hope and pray that one day Tommy will recover fully and be the happy, sweet boy he once was.

Tomato Tomato

One of my favorite things this summer was making my own caprese salads (tomato, fresh mozzarella and fresh basil). I'll miss these! Love the colors.